I envision a long side table that is set to one end of a vast and large room. This table is important and yet forgotten. It blends in with the décor, such an old piece that really is mainly forgotten about. One day you realize how neglected and untouched this table has become. It is dusty, dirty, rough and in need of some major TLC.
Then one day amongst your healing, your eyes seem to come back into focus on this table. You begin to wonder what stories it holds. Where has it been? Why did you forget about it in the first place? Antiques carry so many stories and their bones are always good. They generally are sturdy even in their old age. The wisdom seems to carry them through.
Trauma Touch Therapy
This is my story as I embarked on a new level of healing in TTT. I have dealt with my childhood trauma over and over again. That is the beauty of it. You get to keep trying. With every try comes a deeper understanding of why you may feel how you feel, see things as you see them and store up pent tension where it is stored. Trauma touch therapy has enlightened my view of my personal work. It gave me a glimpse of some of my feverishly stored authenticity. A simple laugh of genuine expression called out in the room ‘there she is’, there is all of her.
I have stored up versions of myself. Versions that only come out to play in safety, others in business, others when comedic moments are necessary. A few of these parts are so vulnerable they only peak around the corner and rarely show up to the party. But in this most recent version of my healing there was this moment of synchronicity where they all danced together. It was a true moment of healing that was only possible with the witnessing of an amazing practitioner on my integrative journey. She called out my verbiage of “tabling.” I recalled the fact that I have tabled some important items in life to survive. To get by. This is indeed a trauma response. However, I am ready to start looking at the table and seeing what gems lie there. What pieces of me have I long forgotten about, hidden and or tabled?
Returning to Wholeness
What are you tabling that could possibly resurface in the most beautiful way? It is time to refurbish your table, dust it off and put on a new coat of paint. It is time to run your hand along the smooth grain of wood and notice all the gems that might have been left there a long time ago. Now is the time to heal.